dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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