i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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