Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
