eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
