Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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