Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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