Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
