Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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