Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize