I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
