I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
my poor anus
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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