hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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