Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(859): View more from Kentucky

$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.

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(815): View more from Illinois

Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.

(815): View more from Illinois

Grandpa would have been proud

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(917): View more from New York City

I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.

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(509): View more from Washington

I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(713): View more from Texas

the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???

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(682): View more from Texas

I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.

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(775): View more from Nevada

The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.

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(240): View more from Maryland

Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that

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