North Korea, Best Korea!
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
