the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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