I wish life had little blips of pornography
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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