I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize