why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
