In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
