Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Randomize
