the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
