i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Everyone says I win the strip club
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize