Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize