I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
