Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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