I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
