Can Purell be used as lube?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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