Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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