I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
