i can't believe i had my finger in that
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
