"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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