Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize