Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
