I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
