i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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