sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
