this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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