Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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