He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
