Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
