I must be too annoying 4 u.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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