Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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