You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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