I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
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I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
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well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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