Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
this beer tastes like vomit already
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize