The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I just found a bag of teeth...
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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