I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
