After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
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You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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