There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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