Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
I want to make a zoo with you.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
